Things are getting better...

Hey guys,

I have been doing wonderful these last few days and I thankgod for Facebook lol I have found alot of ppl I went to high school with and catching up with them have been great. I really enjoy talking to ppl I havn't talked to in years and to find out ppl liked me but I was taken because I was with Jon wow if I only knew, but then again if Jon and I never got together I wouldn't of had the beautiful baby girl that I do have and she is my everything and people from day one when everything all came crashing down always told me things happen for a reason and well now I see it!

I have been talking to a guy who just came out of a 5 year relationship and he was happy to hear that he wasn't alone lol which is isn't at all. We talked on msn from 11:20pm to 5am my time he lives outwest and is doing great for himself so I am happy for him because that is something that he couldn't have done around here at all Sussex is just too small. I talked to him the next day and he said he felt bad keeping me up I said no you didn't I was happy to have someone to talk to because I couldn't sleep so he said oh in that case no problem it was my pleasure lol. Him and I are going out as friends on the 27th when he comes home for Xmas so I am really excited about that for sure. He told me not to worry about the cost and we could go anywhere I wanted to go I was like Holy Shit! That is just crazy and I even asked him if he was serious lol and he is Jon nevered paid for anything and so that made my jaw dropped down to the floor insane and he said that I should be treated like a princess I was like wow I have never felt that way and he told me that Jon was a dick for doing the things that he has done to me and he said that he will support me in anything I need support in WOW he is just amazing and he really doesn't know how much he has helped me, but anyone that knows me should see the difference I hope.

I was soo mad at Jon last night I have worked so hard on getting Alexis on a schedule and well I called and at 9pm she was eating cake and here she would have been asleep by 8:10pm so I was pretty upset that he wasn't doing his part by keeping her on the schedule that I have started with her and then when she goes to his house it takes me 3 days again to get her back on track and that isn't fair to Alexis or me I don't think anyway. So as soon as I can I am going to talk to Jon and see what I can figure out because I don't know what else to do I really don't.

Alot of things have come up lately and I have been doing alot of thinking and honestly for the best interest of Alexis I am thinking about taking this to court and getting full custody of her and then I really want to move outwest because alot of ppl I know are out there and I miss them the ones I used to hang out with at school. I think I can better my future and better myself adn raise Alexis better out there knowing that I won't have to put up with anymore bullshit from them two because I can't take much more. I will miss everyone here though and all my family and friends, but I want and need to be happy again and if moving away is what it takes then that is what I am going to have to do. I am still going to think long and hard about it though and maybe Jon just might let me move with her and he will see her when I fly home and things just like everyone will. I don't know if I will get that lucky but I should because he is the one that has put me through everything and is driving me away because I don't want to see him or Tami and I have the right to say that.

Alexis took her 1st steps the day she turned 144 months old, but she isn't walking yet she will take a step or two and then go back to crawling but I know she will be walking and talking and running before I know it and that makes me so proud of her and all the new things makes my heart melt and I know she will do just fine with her mommy because I can be a good mom!

That is all for now I have to get ready for my Dr. Appt today fun fun. My results from my blood work will be in and I am scared to death but I know I will be just fine and that is how I have to think is positive and keep my head up high!

G2G Bye!